We live in an amazing time. It’s easy to find resources to help ourselves and to share who we are. Be yourself. Your true authentic self. You can be a like a light for other people to follow. Not necessarily for people to want to be just like you.
But …your light shines on others nooks and crannies, which most people don’t even want to see. This people will not be moved and might even try to dim your light. However this calls some people forth to also be their authentic self. Share your gift unapologetically with the world. Release your core and shine light on others paths. This is the reason why I share.
Let go of the external
We start to get lost when our programming takes us away from who we are: the messages you received in life. For example you’re supposed to go to school, get a job or start a business, have a family, follow your religious or cultural practices, eat certain foods etc. These all have good well-meaning intention. But it gives you a robotic life.
You push yourself down and move like you are supposed to. Repeating these messages to yourself even without anyone having to say a thing. This prior condition that makes you forget the truth of what you are made of.
What about you did you shrink or change to fit? I’ll never have it all figured out; it’s a life journey, but I was so caught up with societies picture of family and several other images of life. Begin to heal. Do that one thing you were not allowed to do. Then add as you start to release your core.
Use your loss to create your best self.
When you have experienced loss, you disappear even deeper. It doesn’t have to be the loss of a loved person. It can be the loss of a relationship or falling out, losing a job or a business, a health complication, or even just not having the time to take part in your interest.
This can completely destroy you when your whole identity is wrapped up in it. I threw out the idea of a two-parent home for my kids, I gave up the road to architecture licensure I had set, and I gave up all the foods I was accustomed to.
After experiencing loss, I chose this shift to start to create a life I love. Your loss has come to you, to move you in a different direction. This direction that works for you is seen well in hindsight.
Release what doesn’t serve your highest self.
You will have to look inside to make this shift. Let go of what no longer serves you. There is a saying I can’t quite remember, please feel free to comment below if you’re familiar with the saying.
Only a fool will continue to row the boat to move forward after they have arrived on land.
I felt like this was harsh, but this was me exactly; trying to fix my marriage and make it work with an abuser; giving up all of my time to move up in my career; looking for healthier ways to cook the food that was making me sick.
The boat has served its purpose. Leave it behind. What do you need to do to release your core? What no longer serves your highest self?
Look deep within and take the first step.
What feelings does your life bring you, your relationships, your career, your health, your interest? Make that first step of change. Don’t overwhelm yourself with the big picture and create a mountain to climb.
Beginning to heal doesn’t need to be too overwhelming. Move just an inch. Your ability to trust yourself is really important. You need to utilize your guidance system in the way it was intended when you came into your physical body to begin with.
Use these massive moments to go inward and do the work. What did that moment call you forth to do? What is your heart and your soul calling for? Nothing external will make you feel good. Not the career, the relationship, the food, material things, any addictions. You have to do the work internally.
Remember your core;
it’s still there underneath your trauma.
It can be hard to see your true self clearly if you’ve been living in fog => F.O.G. Fear. Obligation. Guilt. What are you afraid of? What do you feel obligated to do? What are you feeling guilty for? No matter what you look like now, your true self is still there and reachable.
I like this animated scenes that show this so well. Lion King: when Simba is told to, “Remember who you are”. Moana: when Te Fiti is sung to “Know who you are”. Spirited Away: when the Stink God takes a purifying bath and is revealed to be Kawa No kami, the God Of The Rivers.
That is the image I relate to the most in Spirited Away: the junk other people throw at us. There are other wonderful scenes in Spirited Away; the movie is great for showing the journey of remembering your true self. It’s not going back to who you were either, but accessing that strength in your core. Let your light shine through.
Consistently work on your inner self.
If you’re wondering why deep down you haven’t healed yourself… Why none of this has gone away. I suggest to you what helped me: spiritual development. Not religion, much less structured religion.
We are more familiar with personal development; the mind work; telling yourself the story to change your paradigm; empowering yourself. But we are not familiar with the spiritual development; awakening what is within us; what is there when you shut down all your thoughts and let go of all the destruction or noise; what is there that transcends physical time and space; the inner child work.
I was able to do the mind work and push through tough situations, while still feeling the same sense of displacement inside. The inner work releases you and enables you to move organically. No need to control, find or chase. It will enable you to release your core and shine light on others paths – beginning to heal.
Be gentle with yourself.
How would you help a child who is crying and afraid? Would you tell them to get over it and get themselves together, or would you give them a hug and help them feel safe and loved. This is what we do to our inner selves: We are not nurturing and we are just pushing for results.
So our inner selves are like that scared child who is told to get over it and get themselves together. This inner child is still afraid. They will not stand tall and be a light bearer. Remember we shouldn’t live in fear, obligation or guilt. It can be hard to shut the inner critic when you are beginning to heal, but keep going: It gets better.
If you do the work internally, you will function in harmony with yourself. Contrast will still exist. But from it you will create more of what you truly desire. (Peace. Rather than fighting or resisting feelings and circumstances.) And you will embrace the contrasting experience, and understand that it is not you being off your path, but still being on your path of aligning with your true self.
It’s a journey, not a destination.
Release your core and shine light on others paths – beginning to heal. True healing doesn’t mean becoming who you were before the downward spiral. It’s a journey to your highest self and you work on it every day. The points above should help you along your path.
Be a light bearer. Let go of the external conditioning. Use your loss to create your best self. Release what doesn’t serve your highest self. Look deep within and take the first step. Remember your core; it’s still there underneath your trauma. Consistently work on your inner self. Be gentle with yourself…
How has your healing looked? When did you know you were beginning to heal? What has helped you move towards your best self? Feel free to comment on your journey and share with those who are beginning to heal, or further along on their journey.
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